Lake Bell is known for writing, directing and starring in films like In a World . . . and I Do . . . Until I Don’t, and stealing scenes in movies and shows ranging from rom-coms (It’s Complicated) to action blockbusters (No Escape) to animated family fare (The Secret Life of Pets) and beyond, and the multitalented actress just added a new credit to her impressive resume: children’s book author.
Bell’s debut picture book, All About Brains: A Book About People, just came out, and the process of writing it was deeply personal for the star, as the heartfelt narrative is inspired by her young daughter’s experience with epilepsy.
With sweet illustrations by Rachel Katstaller and poignant yet funny words by Bell, the book tells a sensitive story of neurodivergence and how, in the author’s words, “These conditions can become a superpower for the children that are facing them, as well as the parents who are supporting them and seeking out guidance and help.”
Bell sat down with First for Women to discuss her caregiving journey and the emotional experience of bringing her daughter’s story to the page.
The real-life inspiration for ‘All About Brains’
Lake Bell’s book was born from an undeniably challenging time. “During the pandemic, we all were just trying to survive,” she recalls. “My daughter, Nova, fell ill with epilepsy, and that condition took over our household at the same time. We were trying to solve it and shapeshift to figure out how to help her. She was having 11 to 16 seizures a day, and we were trying to find the right medication and treatments.”
“That was the springboard that led me to reconfigure our relationship with epilepsy and with seizures in general,” Bell continues. “Initially, it was just plain old scary, and it felt like an unmanageable behemoth.”
During a “share day” at virtual school, Bell encouraged her daughter to share an advocacy badge she’d received from the Epilepsy Foundation. While mother and daughter initially felt a bit nervous about sharing this diagnosis, “What ensued after that was a peer-to-peer conversation,” she says. “The teacher sat back and let the kids ask questions to Nova directly, and she was able to take ownership of her condition. She had a sense of confidence and reframing. At a certain point in her life, she would apologize for having a seizure, and as parents that would break our hearts into a thousand pieces.”
Bell was so moved by seeing Nova talk about her condition with her peers that she chose to set her book during a school share day and gave the protagonist her daughter’s name. “We started looking at Nova’s neurodiversity as a true uniqueness and gift, and part of the tapestry of her wonderfulness,” she says. The book refers to seizures as “brain sparkles,” and Bell explains, “She’s a sparkly creature. She’s expressive and extraordinarily emotionally intelligent, because her brain functions in a way that is extraordinary.”
A full-circle moment
Prior to publication, Bell shared All About Brains with Nova’s classmates. “Reading the book to Nova’s class was really special,” she says. “The questions and the interactions and the curiosity and relatability were profound, and she felt very proud of herself and her representation in the book. It’s part of her identity. She no longer says she’s sorry for her condition, and she definitely has led the charge for how she wants to sit with this, and how she wants to present herself.”
Asked what she hopes readers take away from the book, Bell says, “I hope that it provides conversation and curiosity and generosity when it comes to neurological differences. I hope that parents and educators can read the book to children without fear of talking about the real medical words describing these differences, and that children can feel seen and unashamed about whatever uniqueness they have and how they process things.”
Lake Bell’s advice for parents
Bell urges parents facing a life-altering diagnosis for their child to reach out to others navigating similar issues. “My ex-husband and I relied heavily on the community of other parents going through the same thing,” she says. “When you have a child who is in need, you can only look to others who have forged a path ahead of you, and then your responsibility and privilege and honor is to share that wealth of information with others who might need it.”
Nova was just 5 years old when she was diagnosed, and Bell reflects, “For parents who have really young kids who are just getting diagnosed, that’s pretty much the scariest part. There’s ambiguity and a lot of unknown factors ahead of you. Those are the moments that feel absolutely untenable, and then the parents who are five years down the road can assure you that this is your path and that you are not alone.”
“I just can’t emphasize enough how essential it is to feel in community, especially at a time when marginalized groups are being taxed so mercilessly,” Bell says. “You’re powerful, and there’s power in numbers. Even if you don’t think it, when you’re first coming into it and realizing that your life path looks a bit different than you expected, there’s power in that moment. All of it is a seed for great growth.”
Finding solace in co-parenting and self-care
Bell faced an additional hurdle upon divorcing her husband, artist Scott Campbell, in 2020. “I definitely recommend co-parenting therapy, even if you don’t have a child that’s neurodiverse,” she says. Ultimately, “We are 50-50 in our caregiving, so that’s been huge. We’ve been through the trenches together, and when you have a child who has seen and endured a lot, as parents, you realize, ‘Well, we could fight about dumb s–t, or we could be warriors and comrades in arms for the rest of our lives.’”
Bell also emphasizes the value of self-care, saying, “As a parent, my coping mechanisms are definitely meditation and yoga. And I do ceramics, which is basically playing with dirt, which I like. That’s a huge part of my meditation.”
To find work-life balance, Bell has reframed the time constraints of parenthood as a blessing rather than a source of stress. “Having children has made me much more efficient in my workflow, because there are very clear, delineated hours of the day at which you could write something, and then there are very clear hours of the day when there’s no way you can work.”
“It’s been a gift, because I have to force myself to arrive for my work during the hours I’ve been allocated,” Bell shares. “You get a good cup of coffee and you get yourself there, because you have no choice.”
How Lake Bell’s daughter is doing today
After facing a long and challenging period of uncertainty following her daughter’s diagnosis, Bell reports, “I have the great honor of saying that Nova is currently seizure-free, and has been this way for two-and-a-half years. She’s now 10 years old.”
Bell points out that, “She does have generalized epilepsy that is linked to a genetic mutation, so no matter how many years she goes without seizures, it would be unwise to stamp her as fully grown out of it. All of the neurologists that I’ve come into contact with over the years have taught me that the brain is the one part of our bodies that doesn’t have a clear roadmap that you can follow,” but she remains impressed by just how far her daughter has come.
Bell has found writing her book to be a healing experience, and says that telling her daughter, “When you have a seizure, you’re just a little smarter and a little fiercer, and you’re having a moment where you’re sparkling and bright,” was a meaningful way to change the narrative from one based in fear to one filled with strength and pride. Today, she encourages all parents of neurodivergent children to embrace the sparkle, and find beauty in situations that might initially seem painful.
